🚩 Volume I – Almost Loved, Always Used

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He said he didn’t want anything serious.

I thought if I gave him what he wanted, he’d love me.

🚩 Red Flags I Ignored

  1. He said he wasn’t serious—and I stayed, hoping he’d change.

  2. He invited me out the same day we reconnected.

  3. He admired me with his eyes, not with his actions.

  4. I gave him my body, and he grew emotionally distant immediately after.

  5. He began a relationship with someone else a month later.

  6. He reappeared months later—still in that relationship.

  7. He messaged me on our anniversary, while still with someone else.

  8. He called me naive and gentle as a way to reopen access—not to appreciate me.

  9. He flirted and sexualized me even after I reminded him of his girlfriend.

  10. He invited me to meet his parents under false pretenses.

  11. He joked about adopting me, infantilizing me in front of his family.

  12. He made sexually suggestive gestures in front of his mother.

  13. He blamed me for sharing the truth with a mutual friend.

  14. He begged me not to “ruin his life” instead of taking accountability.

  15. He made me feel physically unsafe. I had to shrink myself just to get out.

✨ What I Learned

  • When someone tells you they don’t want anything serious—believe them.

  • The more quickly someone wants access, the less likely they value connection.

  • Physical intimacy does not guarantee emotional safety.

  • Just because someone is single doesn’t mean they’re emotionally available.

  • Returning after silence isn’t romantic—it’s a form of control.

  • A man who hides you from his partner will never make you feel seen.

  • Being called “gentle” and “naive” isn’t always admiration—it’s a strategy.

  • Meeting his parents doesn’t mean he sees a future—it might just be part of the performance.

  • If someone cares more about being exposed than being accountable, they were never safe to begin with.

  • Feeling physically afraid is not a misunderstanding—it’s a message.

  • I didn’t ruin his life. He ruined his image.

  • I didn’t lose him. I lost a delusion. And in return, I found myself.

Final Reflection

He didn’t lie about being single.
He lied about being safe.

And I lied to myself—thinking I could stay soft and still survive him.

But now I know:
A man who says he doesn’t want anything serious… means it.

And I take men at their word.
Especially when their actions confirm it.

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