🚩 Volume XIV: You Didn’t Get the Girl. You Got Deleted.

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I saw him at temple.

He’s a member of my community —
but I didn’t know him,
and frankly, I didn’t care to.

To me, he was just someone I shared air with
for an hour or so.
No more, no less.

I was with my people.
I wasn’t there to be noticed.
And even if I had been —
he failed the first test.

That Donna — the one who might’ve smiled,
who might’ve softened —
she’s gone.

I am not the kind Donna anymore.
I am the good Donna.
The clear-eyed, quiet Donna
who owes no man anything.

That evening, he found me on LinkedIn —
despite me not having a public profile.
Tracked me.
Searched for me.
Requested to connect.

I ignored it.

The next day,
in my hidden DMs,
a message from a second account.
Tiger something.
Sent the same day.

He said he saw me at temple.
Then asked if I lived in Canada.

A man who couldn't walk up to me
thought he deserved to speak to me privately.
Not with courage.
Not with presence.
But with clicks.

Let this be known:
I am not attracted to men
who don’t approach me properly.

I don’t want a boy
who hides behind usernames.
I want a man.
A real man.
One who looks me in the eye
and steps forward with respect.

🚩 Red Flags He Embodied:

  • No introduction. Thought silent observation was enough.

  • Digital pursuit. Multiple platforms, no permission.

  • Hidden account. Already a red flag.

  • False courage. Online boldness, offline avoidance.

  • Assumed intimacy. Thought proximity equaled entitlement.

  • Lack of masculinity. Wanted to “connect” without showing up.

🌿 What I Learned:

  • Being in the same room doesn’t mean you’re part of my life.

  • Access is not attraction.

  • I’m not flattered by persistence. I’m impressed by presence.

  • A real man doesn’t stalk. He speaks.

  • I don’t engage with men who hide. I’m not playing hide and seek.

  • If you want me, approach me. With honor. With clarity. With intent.

Final Reflection:
Some men make noise.
Others leave scars.
This one left nothing.
And that was enough.

Because I saw the trap
and I walked around it.
I didn’t give him my energy.
I gave him silence —
the loudest no I’ve got.

The Men I Survived.

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